I am not the social type

I admit it… I am not the social type… I have tried to change into a more outgoing person… I have struggled with being too introverted, too quiet… But it simply doesn’t work.. I have to accept simply who I am.

Trying to be someone I am not causes too much anxiety.  It is almost like trying to please others.. and this is not what I want to do.  I started this blog with the idea about the importance of being honest with ourselves and with others.  This blog is about being open and expressing our true feelings without offending others (although being offended is a choice). Well, here I am writing this post and being honest with myself and my readers.  I am not the social type… period.

If I try to be more talkative, or try to come up with a topic to discuss, or attempt to break the silence, I feel awkward and uneasy.  How much more of this discomfort should I endure?  I simply don’t feel comfortable doing it.  Shouldn’t I  be OK with who I am, as long as I am not hurting myself or others?

I enjoy reading, writing, going to the beach, drawing, painting,  listening to music, cooking, playing with my children, and  taking naps. I don’t enjoy very much ( although I don’t mind doing it in a very short period of time) going to parties, talking with anyone in a social setting, calling people, and speaking to a crowd.  I don’t have social anxiety either, since I don’t freak out while in public.  I simply don’t feel compelled to initiate conversations with others I don’t know.  It is not my nature.  I do it at work because it is my job.  But  if I don’t have to, I rather not.  And I think  I need to accept this about myself.  I need to let go of the fear of having to please others and simply be me.

Thank you for reading.

3 thoughts on “I am not the social type

  1. I am like that too. I felt guilty about it for many years – our society doesn’t value introversion. But now I just enjoy coming home every night to a quiet setting with my small family and being in a comfortable calm place. I’m happiest that way, my mind is quietest… don’t feel guilty for another second and just be who you are, like you said.

  2. I’m not the social type either, although I do wonder whether me saying that is dangerous because it could well become a bigger and bigger self-fulfilling prophecy. I do feel like I ought to constantly be going out etc to try to overcome this. To be fair, perhaps it is only the unfamiliarity of social situations which makes me feel awkward in many of them…it’s great to know that we are not alone though. I think there is always an inner calmness which we can return to when the going gets tough…I know that sometimes if I focus my mind in a meditative way, I can tap into a nice inner peace.

    • Larry, I have also tried to master my shyness or awkwardness when I find myself in social settings…. there a few people I can spend time without feeling uncomfortable, which happen to be people who think in similar ways. I guess it has to do with personality.

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