Life summarized 

This existence seems to be merely an awareness based on fabricated thoughts and individualized perceptions we call “reality” that dictates most of our behaviors.  This overall existence called “life” is mostly preferred over the notion of “death” because we usually don’t want to acknowledge the inevitable end of this perceived existence.

We choose what we believe, many times without realizing it, and continue our existence as if what we believe is an ultimate truth.   We deceive ourselves with fantasies and illusions that nourish our egos and makes us feel secure and important… but it is all an attempt to distract us from our destiny: death.

We tend to want to belong to some kind of group and community , creating societies, in order to feel secured and protected (trying to recreate the experience inside the womb).   But we often fail to realize and accept the fact that we are simply deceiving ourselves.  Unconsciously afraid of facing the reality of our mortality.

And because of this profound fear, we continue our journey of biased perceptions attempting to maintain a state of awareness we call “happiness”, not realizing that it depends solely on circumstances that we choose to cherish.

This existence is slowly decaying and shutting down.  This awareness will eventually cease to be present and we will  not even know it has happened.  All we can be aware of is what is experienced at the present moment.  Right now.

Think about it.

 

 

 

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A day at work

imageHere I am. Just coming out of a counseling session with a client who is feeling depressed and physically tired and sick.  He lost both of his legs due to diabetes and he has no hope for the future .. He used to be a great man, he used to educate  other people about history and writing.  But now he does not have any hopes of doing any of that again ..  He is afraid of dying .

Yesterday I saw another client with schizophrenia. His apartment looks like a total disaster , but he is content with his chaotic life.  It is his norm.

The other day  I saw a woman with PTSD with psychotic features.  The voices tell her to cut herself but she tries to ignore them .  She says it is not easy to ignore.  She tries meditation and walking to cope .  But she has been abused and threatened so much in the past that it has become part of her life to be anxious all the time .

I hear all the stories when I go visit the clients that I see. I feel bad at the moment but as soon as I leave,  I go back to my routine. I go back to my own life with my own problems.  Because if I don’t temporarily leave it behind, I may not have a life of my own.

And the next day I do it all over again.

The danger of exclusivity

I drive down the street and I see another car with a bumper sticker that says : “There is only one” with an American flag on it…

Then I ask myself “only one what…?”

People from this “American” culture have learned to believe that they are unique… special… exclusive … The same thing occurs with people who have adopted an exclusive way of perceiving their race, culture, religion, ect.

It is dangerous to insist that whatever we want to represent us is the “one and only”.   It conpartmentalizes us.

It divides us.  Makes us proud.  Puts us on a pedestal. 

It creates an “us versus them ” mentality.   It makes us arrogant.

When we choose to believe that the divine being we put our faith in is the only one,

When we choose to think that the government we are governed by should govern all other lands,

When we choose to adopt a way of life, and believe it is the best one,

And when we choose to use a particular way of perceiving the world, and believe is the ultimate purpose in life,

then we set ourselves for failure.  We start to crumble as human beings.

And we stop being free.

Sick of being Sick

 

I have bimageeen fighting something nasty for the last three days.. First I thought it was allergies.  Then I started getting chills at night.  And now  I’m just feeling like I am in a fog.   I take all kinds of medication.. They don’t seem to help much.

But I shouldn’t complain… A few days ago another one of  my uncles passed away (I have three gone already ).  I was not close to him at all, but my father was.   I just spoke with my father about him.   He said “he was younger than me,  yet he was gone first.”

I cannot help to think of the day that my father passes too.  I have been trying to accept it without getting too emotional.   But the day will come… it is inevitable.  And so will be the day that I am gone and every family member that I know … Because we’re not eternal.

So,  sick or not,  I will simply live this day.   Without complaining.  I may recover tomorrow.  Who knows?

What do you think?

 

Excuse my French

I have been thinking about this lately.

When you are going to curse and you say : “Excuse my French” prior to cursing, that means you can actually STOP yourself from cursing.

But if it slips your mouth and you curse first, then it makes more sense to excuse yourself afterwards.     I suggest you don’t say “excuse my French ” and then curse .   Because if you can pause to excuse yourself, you might as well take the opportunity to change how you choose your words.

Here is an idea: If you are going to excuse yourself first, just don’t curse at all.

Our Destiny

I wake up from a dream… or a comma. I am in a hospital bed. The room feels cold. There is a big window on my right. Sunlight is shinning and giving the room a peaceful atmosphere.
I noticed that the nurses and doctors around me look different… they don’t seem normal. I try to adjust my vision. Oh…wait! they are not even humans! They are actually machines. They look like humans. They move and walk like humans. I am scared! But at the same time I am curious. Another figure comes to the room. This one looks more real… more human.
“Hello… my name is Dr. Smith” she smiles. “How are you feeling?”
I stare at her… studying her face.
“Don’t worry, you are safe here.. ” the doctor assures. She looks young, maybe in her thirties. Long brown hair, and brown skin.
“Where am I..?” I ask puzzled, looking around at the standing machines that resemble humans.
“You are at the hospital…” answers the friendly doctor. “You suffered a car accident and went into a comma. ”
“For how long… I ask, not sure if I want to know the answer.
“Ten years…” answers the doctor with a more serious expression.
“You are kidding me… right?” I am petrified.
“We have been monitoring you all these years… and you finally came through.” answers the doctor. “We are excited that you recovered consciousness.!”
I look around again at the other standing figures. They look metallic, with wires coming in and out of their bodies. One of them has a flat screen, like a computer screen, for a head.
“These are our MAMMs... they are harmless…:” explains the doctor.
“MAMMs..?’ I ask.
Medical Assistant and Monitoring Machines … they help us with vital signs, transporting, and companionship,” the doctor continues to explain. “They are our latest technological advances in the medical field.
I notice that the doctor is wearing a strange looking headphone. He suddenly pulls a thin set of goggles from behind her head to her nose to see through them.
“Your blood pressure and sugar level look fine for now. We will continue to monitor them. You are feeling cold, though, so I will have the MAMMs adjust the room temperature. You also seem to be hungry, is that correct.?”
How did she know? I ask myself. The doctor then leaves the room and leaves me alone in my bed with these strange looking machines. They beep and have lights that flashes. One of them speaks.
“We will give you food in approximately ten minutes…” it sounded human. It was actually a nurse that appeared on the screen of one of the standing machines.
After the meal, I am escorted by one of the machines to the hospital patio on a power chair. The chair also seems to have its own “personality.” It has a small screen on one of the sides that continuously checks my pulse.  I finally breath fresh air.  It is a bright, crisp morning.
I look around and see both real people and MAMMs walking around. Some of the people are eating lunch at tables. Others are simply siting down. But they all are wearing the same kind of goggles that the doctor was wearing. They don’t seem to notice my presence. I don’t recognize any of them.  Some of them are talking, but they don’t seem to be talking to anyone.  They seem to be clueless of what is happening around them.

I finally leave the hospital premises and try to catch a taxi driver.  There are none in sight.  So I start walking. I don’t recall any of my family members.  So I don’t have a place to go.  There are people everywhere. And they are all wearing the same goggles.  There are some machines walking around as well.  Nobody talks or communicate to each other.  It is hard to even distinguish between the humans and the walking machines.  I decide to approach and ask one of the standing pedestrians about my location.

“Excuse me…!” the lady is startled.  She looks at me as if she is seeing a ghost. Then she looks away and continues to ignore me.  Her goggles are a metallic purplish color.

“Excuse me… may I ask you a question. Where is the nearest hotel?” I insist.

The lady looks at me puzzled. “Are you talking to me..?” she asks. She seems to be in her late forties, African American, professionally dressed. Her makeup is bright and excessive. She also seems to be uncomfortable with my presence.

“Well yes I am… can you tell me where is the nearest  hotel.?” I ask again, keeping my distance.

“Hold on!” she says with an attitude. She takes a real close look at me in amazement.  Then she looks away as if looking into space.  She puts her right hand to the side of her head, as if pressing her ear, and utters, “Nearest hotels…”  A few seconds pass, and then she looks back at me and says, “There are three hotels off of 3rd avenue down the road, about a couple of blocks away.  There are like five more on 5th avenue and two on Main street.” she points with her right index finger as she speaks.

“Thanks..” I respond. “How did you figure it out so quick?” I ask her.

“Well… my ‘Igles’, of course!,” answers the lady. She pronounced it, “eye-gls.”

Igles?…What is that?” I ask.

The lady laughs hysterically .  “Where have you been, young man?” asks the lady in a condescending tone of voice. “Have you been living in a cave or something ?” she asks cynically.

“I have been in a comma, ma’am..” I say.

She laughs again.  She does not believe me.  The lady then repeats again, “These are ‘Igles’.  Intelligent Goggles. Get it?” she continues her condescending tone of voice. “Any other questions..?” she asks.

“No …. thank you.”

She then walks away. I notice she puts her right hand on her ear, and  starts talking again, but there is no one around her. She begins a conversation… with nobody.  “You won’t believe who I just happen to meet on the street….!” I could hear her saying as she continues to walk away.

I look around me.  Everyone is doing the same thing.  Adults and children.   Even people driving in their cars are wearing the same goggles.  Did these goggles replace the cell phones?   I look up at some of the billboards that seem to be floating in the air next to the skyscrapers.  One of the billboards is advertising the next generation of communication technology: “I-lenses”.  Does that stand for “Intelligent lenses”?  They seem to be contact lenses that people can wear inside their eyes which can also be used to communicate with each other and browse the internet. There are other billboards announcing computer chips that can be inserted in people’s heads  to change their visions and hearing.

I ask myself: “What have we become…?” I am petrified.  I am lost.  People around me are browsing the internet, communicating to other people, using their goggles.  And there are advertising about moving this technology  further to the point of  interfering with our natural five senses! Nobody recognizes what is happening in front of them or around them.  They all seem to be living in their own world…..

Does this story seem unreal to you?  Just look around you.

 

A Day Without My Cellphone

Wow..! How liberating it is. 

I forgot my cell phone at home this morning.

First, I almost started having a panic attack.

But then I accepted the fact that I simply left it at home.

So I kept driving to work… not knowing who will try to call me.

But then it hit me.

I am truly free from the bond of having a cell phone!

Just like the good old days.

I don’t have to check my email…. Facebook…. text messages…

I don’t have to feel pressured to find out who might be trying to reach me.

Now I can focus more on the present moment.

I can concentrate more on the real world that surrounds me.

It is a beautiful experience.

I may leave my cell phone again in the future…. on purpose.

Wow!… How liberating it is.