We can do better 

We humans constantly deceive ourselves with false ideas.  We trap ourselves with fabricated concepts about who we are and what we are supposed to be.  This existence we call “Life” is a great mystery that few of us consider exploring further than what our five senses allow us to .  

We complain of feeling depressed.  That’s simply our habit of focusing too much on the past that we regret. It is also our selfish way of thinking only about our perceived mysery which is masked by hopelessness.  We are basically trapped in our own living hell, refusing to look beyond ourselves. 

We miss the big picture . 

We complain of feeling anxious and nervous. That’s simply our habit of focusing  too much on an unfavorable  future which will never happen.  It is also our selfish way of thinking about our own perceived  vulnerability and limitations which is masked by helplessness and fear. It paralyzes us, so we make ourselves stagnated in our own ruminating thoughts.  We are basically trapped in our own living hell , refusing to look beyond ourselves. 

We miss the big picture. 

So we tend to create our own addictions to temporarily and superficially cope with the mysery. We become slaves of technology, slaves of substances , slaves of unhealthy relationships .  We fill our minds with more junk that come from the media, religion, and politics.  We dig a hole in the ground and stick our heads pretending we are okay when in reality we are drowning in our own created hell. 

We miss the big picture . 

But we have a choice. 

We can look beyond ourselves and start looking at the bigger picture.  We can start by accepting our mortality and be ok with it.  We can consider the fact that we are not alone in this existence and start helping each other instead . We can escape from our own selfish mysery. 

Donate . Volunteer .  Visit.  Assist.  Serve. 

Reach out to others in need and we will automatically be helping ourselves.  Like living cells that help each other to maintain the organism alive.  Our planet is the organism. 

When death comes, let’s mourn together. When hunger and disaster strike us, let’s assist each other . When blessings come, let’s celebrate together.  Let us embrace our humanness, including our  limitations along with our strengths. 

Not in our own selfish, individual mysery.  But collectively and selflessly in cooperation.  

Let us embrace our fellow human beings. 

Advertisements

Think about your thoughts …

IMG_4994.jpg

Our minds control our lives.

We often say to other people  “Try not to think about it” , “Don’t be so negative” or “Try to be positive.”  What we are really saying is, “Change your thoughts and perceptions about the situation.”

We often reflect with our words the reality that most of our experiences are based on our thoughts and perceptions.  Our lives are basically dictated by the ideas and concepts we have in our minds.  The interesting thing is that most of the time we do not realize it.

Our minds are so powerful, and yet we don’t recognize that we can control it so that we can control our circumstances.  In other words, we are able to change the way we think if we choose to.

The challenge comes when we unconsciously identify with whatever it is that we have chosen to value in our lives.  And we identify with it simply because we do not want to accept the inevitable fact of our mortality.  And it becomes an automatic habit which we do not rethink about.  It is normal to perceive ourselves as white, black, Mr. and Mrs. Jones, a teacher, a construction worker, a mom, a dad,  a Cubs fan, an American, a soldier, etc.  It makes us who (we think) we are.

In previous blog posts, I have talked about how our thoughts and ideas can be used to feed our ego, which is the fabricated self that we keep nurturing in order to avoid thinking about our own mortality.

So we choose, or we are taught to identify with, a family name, a particular race, ethnicity, political party, profession, etc.  Simply because we want to maintain ourselves distracted and entertained with identities that help us feel alive and valued.   In other words, away from the reality of our death, the ultimate unknown.  So we keep deceiving ourselves.

Also, when we say “Good luck!” or “I’ll pray for you!”, we are basically saying that, because we cannot control or directly intervene with a difficult situation, we wish someone else a favorable outcome by thinking they may receive some assistance from an outside source beyond our control.  In other words, I cannot help you directly, but I am claiming that somehow you receive some help beyond my human capacity.

So, pay attention to what you think.   Review and contemplate on how each statement you  make can reflect the fear of the unknown.  Fear of your mortality.

Think about your thoughts.

 

 

Category 5: a reminder of our fragile lives and the audacity of the federal government . 

The island of Puerto Rico where I was born and raised has suffered a severe storm catastrophe.. it has been almost destroyed. One hundred percent of its power was wiped out. There was no communication for days. We could not reach our loved ones in the island so we did not know if they were dead or alive. It has been one of the worst natural disasters for puertoricans in a century.

It just makes me think about how fragile human life is.  In a few hours everybody’s lives were dramatically changed. . A few people died and others were just left homeless .

Now people are struggling to survive in an island with no power , no water, and few resources .. Food is scarce and gas is limited.  And now the federal government is finally arriving and helping out… but it’s not enough .  The mayor of Puerto Rico’s capital, Mrs. Cruz, made it very clear that there are people who are dying and there is  not enough help from the federal government.

No way to go to hospitals or gas stations because there is not enough gas… can’t get gas because the gas stations are empty or have long lines.. can’t go to the grocery stores to get water and food because there is no gas in cars… can’t call anyone because there is no signal or internet… so on and so forth. 

And now the president of this “great nation” is saying that the mayor of San Juan has poor leadership skills, and that the people of Puerto Rico want ” everything to be done for them.”

Screw him! 

Now he is planning to travel to Puerto Rico this Tuesday.   To do what? Make a show and pretend he cares about the victims ? It’s all politics, and he should be politically incorrect ..  the government will spend too much money sending this clown and protecting him during this trip . This money should be spent helping the people of Puerto Rico.  

The mayor or San Juan said she is mad as hell… we should all be mad  as hell. 

Obsolete thinking

We are living in times when there is still communities and organizations that adopt a way of thinking that should be obsolete by now. Thinking and believing that one particular race is superior to others is simply ignorant and immature. 

These are individuals who cannot accept the fact that their way of thinking is already obsolete. Cannot accept the fact that we are finally realizing that we are one community under the description of simply “being human.”

We have been growing and becoming one community.  Those who resist and practice hatred continue to choose to live in their own premature and underdeveloped frame of mind.  They identify with the old way of thinking that is based on segregation , division, and discrimination.  It is simply a lazy way of describing our society.  It is trying to feel better about themselves by putting others down . Practicing hatred and discriminating is another way of bullying. 

Choosing to perceive one’s race , ethnicity , culture, and belief system as superior to others says a lot about our own insecurities.  It says that we are afraid. It says that there is something we don’t like about ourselves without admitting it .  It says that I cannot look at my own faults and shortcomings , so I’m going to focus on others instead who seem different than me and then attack them.  It is basically based on fear. 

But we can do better. We can live our lives, not based on fear, but based on acceptance and love.  We can live our lives accepting each other as mere human beings and learning to live as one community.  We can still do this and celebrate diversity.  A rainbow would not be a rainbow without its different colors .  A forest would not be a forest without its various kinds of plants, animals, and trees. Our bodies would not be a complete body without its different parts performing their own functions and still work harmoniously together . 

Let us unapologetically expose  the hatred , and then replace  it with acceptance and love . 

Accepting the inevitable 


It is so hard to admit what cannot be denied.  It is difficult to accept that this life has an end. But it is a step that we all must take in order to live a full life. 

My dear mom asked me the other day:  “And what if he gets worse ? ”  She was referring to my Dad who is currently in a nursing home and who is deteriorating rapidly.  And my response to her sounded cold and harsh.  I said , “He is going to get worse.”  

 But it is the reality.  It is simply what we all must face eventually and live peacefully with our mortality.

  I don’t want it either.  I want all of us to continue to live on.   Forever.  But what I want is not always what needs to happen. 

We will all eventually meet our destiny. We will have to say good bye to many loved ones. 

We will have to face the ultimate experience. 

We will have to accept our mortality. 

Shifting gears: developing a new perspective in life 

Beginning to explore new ways of seeing this existence we call life.   Starting not to care so much (or at all) about what others think of me.  Letting go of an unexplained anger that is consuming me.  Learning to say goodbye to decaying loved ones without regrets.  Living each moment peacefully. 

 These have been my latest challenges.

I don’t want to continue to live through the motions.  I am beginning to realize that caring about what others think about me is very detrimental… it can limit how much I can be myself.   Because that’s what I want to be: myself.   Manifest my talents..  Express my opinions freely.   Do what I love.  Accept my limitations. 

I am not getting any younger, so I am taking a new shift in my life. 

Whether people like it or not, I am moving forward in my journey.   I am not stopping unless it is completely necessary.  Maybe a pause here or there to deal with pain and suffering that life brings sometimes. But on a continuous path to growth and enlightenment.   

I am tired of pretending . I am tired of hesitating and waiting for something to happen or to come.  I am moving forward.

 I am introverted , and that is not a disability or a problem. It’s just the way I am.   It is also a label, like many labels we put on ourselves to try to make sense of this senseless world.  To try to identify with something … to belong to something.  

But I will express myself more freely. More assertively.  

Thanks for reading. 

There will be more. 🙂

Papi, what is happening to you?: The unforgiving reality of old age


Visiting my Dad , whom I call Papi in Spanish, has been a sweet and sour experience.  I came to visit him in Puerto Rico for a few days… because I miss him and  I wanted to see him again.

During the time I spent with him during these few days , I start questionning again the absurdity of this existence.   What is, if any, the purpose of this life ?  Why are we born to simply die and cease to exist at the end?

Papi was an active man who worked very hard, had many friends and went to many parties.  He was known as having a good sense of humor and making jokes all the time.  He always dressed up with the latest fashion and style.  Papi often took good care of his belongings, particularly his hair.    He also has been a jovial and friendly individual.  He laughed hysterically and made jokes with his friends about politics and life in general. He enjoyed drinking with friends and eating spicy food.

He went to the army for a short period of time, but he often reminded us of his military routine.   Papi married my mom and had four sons.  He worked hard at a pharmacy warehouse . I remember visiting him at his job which was upstairs.   Papi would buy me candy and sandwiches “medianoche” for mid morning snack.   He also taught me one time how to ride my bike, how to take a shower, and how to clean my shoes.  He was very particular about his personal belongings.


Now most of that is gone.  He can barely walk and is more forgetful.  He is in his late 70s and does not eat very much. He is retired and can barely take care of himself.  It’s almost like he has become a different person.   It makes me wonder,  what is happening to my Papi?

In spite of the changes, he continues to do certain things that shows glimpses of who Papi really is. He enjoys doing word search puzzles.   Papi sometimes still makes the kind of jokes he used to make.  He remembers most of his family members and friends.

I can’t help but to question again the reason for this existence.   The purpose of us living in this state of awareness we call “life” if at the end it is going to be gone.  My Papi was a jovial and active man.  Now he is a weak and serious old man.   Like the winter that comes and takes away all the beauty of the trees and the flowers and the sunshine, so does old age take away the sunshine that I often found in my Papi.   Will there be a spring after this?

Most of Papi is already gone.  Most of what he reflected has faded away.

I guess Papi is not completely gone.  At least not in my heart.